What On Earth Have We Done?

This week I was looking at the photo album of Charlie's life that Bethel gave us.  The first picture starts when he is 2, when he first arrived at Bethel, and the last one is when he is "meeting" us via Skype.  I have looked at this a few times over the past months, and enjoy getting glimpses into his life before us.  But this week looking at those pictures broke me.  I wept.  I was suddenly struck by all of those years that this sweet and amazing boy went without a family.  His file was prepared when he was 2, and we were told that we were the first family to ever even request to look at it.  Charlie!  The most amazing kid!  No one had ever even asked to look at his file.

So, my heart broke for him.  But it was also a fresh reminder (and I believe from the Lord) that there are so many other kids, that are just as amazing as Charlie, that are waiting for someone to step up and ask for their file.  They are still fatherless.  They are watching the other, younger kids get adopted.  Their hearts are breaking.  God's heart is breaking. And so is mine.  I am specifically praying for a family for Robbie.  He is just as awesome as Charlie, looks great in a tux, and would bring so much joy to any family.  Yet he waits, and waits.

I personally believe that adoption can literally change the world.  In China, orphans age out of the system at 14 years old.  If they are not adopted, they can't do much for the world, but the world does a lot to them.  If they are adopted, they become brothers, sisters, sons, daughters, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, engineers, teachers, lawyers, nurses, doctors, social workers, world CHANGERS!



I don't have to tell you how many people Charlie has already blessed.  If you read this blog, you know.  If you know him, you know.  (And he is even more of a blessing now that he is on medication for ADHD-- Ha!)  But, who knows what would have happened to him, had we not said YES to God's call to adopt?  We might be crazy, we might be brave, but we're not special.  We are normal people who don't want to regret not doing something that we know is the right thing to do.

We have been home nine months, and there are still days that I am so overwhelmed that I think, "What on earth have we done?"  But I never, ever regret the decision decision to adopt.  I know that adoption is not for everyone.  Not everyone is called to adopt, not everyone is equipped to do it.  But I do believe that many, many people would like to, like the idea of it, but just never take the leap.  If you think you might be called, please talk to us.  Please pray about it.  Talk to your family about it. You can change the world, one vulnerable child at a time.

Oh You Fancy Huh?

Cruising.  I am not a huge fan, but for the past two years Stephen's job has been to market a new kind of cruising, for people that want to make a difference in the countries that they visit. He and a small team of people created Fathom with Carnival Corporation.  My parents are huge fans of cruising and they were planning on going on a Carnival cruise to The Bahamas over Spring Break, so we decided to join them.  Lord knows we needed a vacation, and we weren't sure how Charlie would do on a Fathom cruise at this point.  Well, he loved the Carnival cruise.  And he loved the "Bahameds."



It sailed out of Charleston on Tuesday.  We arrived on Monday and went to get some seafood for dinner.  On a whim at dinner, my mom said, "I wonder how far we are from the B-E-A-C-H."  I looked it up on my phone and we were only 10 minutes away.  So after dinner, we drove down to Folly Beach and Charlie met the ocean for the first time.  He could hear it and feel it, but due to his vision seemed to have no concept of how big it was.  Within just a few minutes he was all the way in, and it was FREEZING.  His squeals were adorable.  Watching him that night was a memory that we will all keep forever.  It was magical.  On the way back to the car he said, "Mom, do we have one of those close to our house?  I love it."

The cruise was a bit challenging at times with Charlie, due to his impatience, hyperactivity and sensory issues, but overall he had a great time. Thanks to his cane, he was very independent getting around, and it was very entertaining to watch people watch him.  I typically would follow him about 10 feet back to give him some autonomy, but not quite as much as he thought he had.  Since I am white and he is Chinese, most people didn't realize that I was with him, because I don't really look like I would be his mom.  One time this guy stopped him and said, "Hey buddy, what's your name?"  (Thinking he was lost.)  My mom chimed in and said, "Oh, he's with us."  About the same time Charlie said, "I'm Charlie."  So the guy said, "Hey, Charlie.  Where are you from?"  And he said, "I am from China, but now I live in America because my family adopted me.  8 months ago.  I am 8.  8 year old."  The guy said, "That's so awesome.  We are so glad you are here!"  I got tears in my eyes then, and I have them now.  People can be so kind in little moments like that.



Another time, Charlie and Sam were in the hot tub and Charlie got out.  Apparently it didn't occur to Sam that Charlie didn't know where we were, nor could he find us, since he can't see more than one foot in front of him.  About 10 minutes later, Sam came out and walked over to our table.  He said, "Charlie got out about 10 minutes ago, but I don't know where he went."  My heart stopped and I started rushing all over the deck.  It was so crowded.  I didn't see him anywhere.  About 2 minutes into the search, I hear the DJ say over the microphone, "Dawn, your son Charlie is on the stage looking for you.  He wants you to come and dance with him!"  Lol!  Charlie said he had been all over the deck (without his cane) and finally someone asked him if he was lost.  By this point on the cruise, most people recognized the independent Chinese boy with the cane, and many even called him by name!  (There were 2,000 people on our ship.  He made his mark.)

He always wanted to lead our group.  Whether he knew where he was going or not.  He would get very irritated if we tried to "cut" in line.  He is a fearless, confident, 8 year old leader, who has never been on a cruise ship or to The Bahamas before, and he cannot see.  So it got interesting.



Another amazing moment was Charlie's first (witnessed) sunset.  He sees light really well, and perched up in our window, he could actually see the sun disappearing.  He was cheering for it and squealing, and when it was gone he said, "That was amazing!  That really made my day!"  And danced around on the bed.



Charlie loves fancy things and likes the idea of being fancy, but since he can be like a bull in a china shop and is so loud and crazy, he hasn't had many opportunities to be so. He didn't do great in the dining room at dinner but did at breakfast because you get pastries right away.  We got him decaf coffee and he drank it with a spoon and ate 4-5 danishes every time.  He'd say, "I'm so fancy.  Look how fancy."  The servers were great with him and called him by name.  They'd bring him whatever he asked.  He ate like a king.

One afternoon my mom asked him which pair of shoes he wanted to wear-- his flip-flips or his Crocs?  "Which one is fancier?" he asked.  Next time we'll bring a suit and tie.

There was a camp for the kids that Sam and Kate enjoyed and Charlie went to a couple of times.  He liked to explore and roam, and they stayed in one room, so he got a little bored. There was a Green Eggs and Ham themed breakfast that he couldn't handle because it was so loud and you had to wait for food, but luckily my parents were able to take him for a walk so the rest of us could enjoy it.  It was awesome!  We LOVE Dr. Seuss.

For weeks before the cruise, Charlie asked repeatedly about the piano bars.  He was very curious about them, and I was concerned that he wouldn't be allowed in.



Well, the actual piano playing didn't start until 9:30pm (he goes to bed about 7:30-8:00), but he was allowed in to look around, and he loved the neon signs all over the place.  He touched every square inch of that piano bar.

When we were in Freeport, he had lots of questions for our taxi driver, and sat up front with him. The driver was charmed and really enjoyed him.

Charlie said for a souvenir he wanted something really, really fragile.  So, we helped him pick out a glass dolphin.  He loves seeing the light come through it.  It is really, really, fancy.  And currently still intact.