Baby Steps

"Pleasantly confused" is a term we use in nursing for a patient that has no idea where they are or who they are, but they are sweet and cooperative.  These patients can require more time and energy from their caregivers because you have to prevent them from harming themselves, but they are usually so sweet that you really don't mind that much.  The past couple of days, I have been thinking that Charlie is "pleasantly hyperactive." He is still a busy busy boy, but he has been very happy and sweet the past few days.  The last time he really got to my patience was on Thursday when he completely destroyed the playroom for no apparent reason.  I mean he dumped every single bin, box, cart, etc with toys, Legos or crayons in it onto the floor within about 4 mins.  He pitched a 7 minute tantrum afterward and I told him that I was sad that he had done that and I was sad that he wouldn't get to go to his friend Gabe's pool until he had cleaned it up.  He didn't say anything, but within a few seconds, he was making his way back down to the playroom and worked for 1 hour and 20 mins to clean it up. He never complained once.  So, like I've said before, he can do some infuriating things, but he's pretty easy to forgive.

Expectations always affect the way we experience and react to situations.  I expected Charlie to act immature, but since he's 7, I thought that would mean he would act about 5.  But he acted about 3.  I responded to him as I would a 3 year old (babying him, sticker charts, reading baby books, understanding he needs praise for every little thing he does, knowing he has no attention span, etc) and he is becoming much happier and I am becoming more patient.  His obedience and overall attitude has improved dramatically this week, so I'll go ahead and say that now he is acting like a 4 year old, yay!  Yes, it is hard to imagine what he will be like in school, but that's still 5 weeks away-- thank the Lord.  I believe that some of his behavior is related to being in institutionalized care since he was 1, but I think A LOT of it is just he is overwhelmed, stressed and has a lot of language to learn.  The more English he is speaking seems to be really improving his level of frustration.  We are also realizing what a great sense of humor he has.  We knew he was funny, but now he is showing us he is witty too.  Before the only "funny" word he knew was poo-poo, which only Sam thought was funny.  Now, he can make me laugh with his "jokes" too.  He just put down one of the cats after she whined and he said, "Good job, Charlie.  Mama, cat likes Let It Go too!"

This Tuesday he will have his first doctor's appointment at the pediatrician, and next week he'll start to be evaluated for school.  The following week we'll see the ophthalmologist and may be able to get a better idea of what his vision is like, if it will get worse, or if there is any chance for improvement. So, back to the pleasantly hyperactive title... He is so sweet to all of us, even the family member that rolls her eyes when he hugs and kisses her.  He bounces when he walks.  He jumps off of the diving board with gusto.  He says he's sorry to everything and everyone he runs into and rubs it/them to make it okay.  While I am writing this, he just said, "Shhh, Charlie.  Mama is working."  He is so adorable and so charming that he's wrapped me around his little finger!

I am certainly tired, but we've figured out a few things that will occupy him for 10 -15 mins or so, and so I'm adjusting my "must-do's" around those activities and facing the fact that most of the other things won't be done for a while.  I'm sure one day I'll look back and laugh that he liked to clean house, but he really does.  He cleaned the kids' rooms today without being asked.  He enjoyed the praise he got, and that may have been his motive all along, but I'll take it!  His English is changing so fast, I wish I could record him every day.  He has been saying, "tank you, mama" and today he just started saying, "sanks, mom."  This week, he has discovered the hose, decided he doesn't like to swim in floaties and now snacks like a normal kid and eats healthy meals.  2 weeks ago he snacked all.day.long.  It was unreal how much he ate in a day.  Charlie and I survived Stephen being out of town for 2 days.  I don't want to do it again next week or anything, but it was better than I expected. Rejoicing in the baby steps.